My oldest and I were recently invited to sit on a panel for the Common Sense Summit on Kids and Families. The event took place in San Francisco last week. We discussed parenthood in this digital time. We sat with resident Aura Chief Medical Officer, Scott Kollins; the amazing Editor in Chief for Parent Magazine, Grace Bastidas; and Jill Murphy, the Chief Content Officer for Common Sense Media. To say we sat among giants in the tech field would be an understatement of this 2-day event. This summit gave stage to many voices that need to be heard. These included youth voices, policymakers, and experts in adolescence and brain science. It allowed tech companies that need to hear them to listen.

The Common Sense Summit was organized by Common Sense Media (CSM), it is a parent tech support website. I have referenced it as a tool I use to navigate movie, book, and game content. I do this before my children view, read, or play them. This was the second annual event for CSM, and it was eye-opening for me; here are my earnest takeaways.

Parents feel lonely while navigating this space. I received an overwhelming outpouring of appreciation from fellow blog moms, podcasters, and women in technology. They thanked me for speaking up for parents in this space. I met so many parents. They feel like technology and their children are an incredible demand on them. There are few or no resources available for them. The research is being done and stats are rolling in; this tech world is more dangerous than we thought. I do not want to take away from the distinct advantages that technology can bring to our world. It can even enhance learning and experiences for children. However, the mass unregulated content that is available today is causing harm and trauma to children. This is no light issue. As a mom to three, I favor the “less is best” policy when it comes to technology. This policy, according to this conference, landed my family in the “outlier” category. Wherever parents stand on when and how to give tech/screens to their children, the common feeling is this is hard. We are going at it alone.

The next takeaway is that tech companies care, but it feels surface-level. This conference was sold out, and from Apple to YouTube to Anthropic, companies were here to listen. Unfortunately, I struggle to see the action behind this listening. As a parent, it feels as though tech companies will say the right things. However, our children are still left vulnerable in areas that are growing so quickly. It feels impossible to keep up with them. The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt is an eye-opening book. It discusses the real toll that “phone-based childhoods” are taking on our next generations (a read I highly recommend). All the while, big tech companies are adding more and more ways to have apps hidden on phones. These apps are masked as safe. More content is available for young eyes before their brains are ready. However, one of the stars that stood out to me from this conference was Bill Ready, CEO of Pinterest. He shared the levels that Pinterest has gone to in order to keep it safe for children. As a result, it is not like other social media. I always felt that Pinterest was my ‘safe’ app, the one I open and just dream—well, no wonder! They worked hard to make it. They kept it that way even when they lost monetarily to start. All social media companies should follow suit!

California is leading the US in policy to keep children safe on technology. New York follows closely. My earnest kiddo and I left with an urgent need to take action. We decided to write to our legislators and state representatives. We want to call on them to create laws for safer online environments for children and youth. This includes safety on phones, social media, and with AI. Think globally, act locally, right?! We are writing our letters today. We are asking for policy change. You can too if this resonates with you. Google your state representatives and get their emails. Ask them what they are doing to keep our most vulnerable populations safe in this unregulated tech world. Luckily, we have a state representative’s office less than a mile away, and we will be hand delivering his letter.

The last takeaway was this: I am so grateful that we waited until 14 years old before getting our oldest a phone. We have no plan for any social media (other than Pinterest) before 18. I did my own research, Grace exclaimed on our panel that I have “read actual research papers”. I explored any and all I could find about screen time, social media, and tech on growing brains. Years ago, when phones entered our parent radar, there was as little as I could find. All signs pointed to wait. Wait to give phones. Wait for social media. Wait until you have done research on how technology like this is affecting our children. What we did in our home seemed like an anomaly to many we met with, yet inspired many more. It is okay to wait and learn. It is safer to avoid handing over the tiniest computer. This can lead to unsafe spaces accessible in their pockets.

It was such an honor to grace the same stage as Hillary Clinton, Dr. Nadine Burke Harris, and Geoffrey Canada. The greater honor was the chance to speak to parents. They are struggling with deciding when and how to introduce AI, phones, and social media to their children. To share our story and have it resonate with so many, I was truly blessed. Be sure to check out the Common Sense Summit on Kids and Families next year. I am certain it will only get better from here! You can also view this year’s panels by searching #CSSUMMIT25.

Stay tuned. I will share what we did before introducing a personal mobile smart phone to our 14 year old soon.

x. earnest mom